Sunday, 22 February 2015


In real life, I have very few friends. My life is very simple and uneventful.

Sometimes, I envy people who frequently post pictures of themselves attending parties and get-togethers. I say to myself, "Wow, they are so lucky they have such exciting lives."

Then, I remind myself that this is my choice to keep life simple. I have eliminated people who I believe are vexation to my spirit. I'd rather be alone that have friends like that.

There was once a girl who, when I posted a picture of my dream wedding shoes, posted a comment in my journal. Her comment was this...

" Ouch! Those look painful".

I found that comment quite hurtful because I saved up for those Louboutin Pumps. I restrained my inner demons from responding.

Another time, I shared about a wedding seminar that S and I attended. I shared about how the seminar helped us understand why we fight and helped us understand how to resolve the fights. The same girl made this comment...

"I'm glad my fiancé and I don't fight."

I was really put off. There I was humbly sharing the flaws of my relationships and she had the audacity to rub in my face that hers was bright and dandy.

If you know me in real life, you know how mean I can be. My tongue is sharp and my punches are strong. If I choose not to respond, it's because I don't want you to cry. 

As a marketer, I am trained to read between the lines, to know your fears and insecurities  and to see what's behind the facade.

What's behind my facade?

I am a recovering bitch. I am working on being nice. I am trying to keep life simple. I am trying to appreciate what I have. In short, I am trying to change. And if you are in my way, I will drop you in a heartbeat. 

I believe there are just people who bring out the worst in me. It could be someone who makes bratty comments or just someone who posts endless selfies. 

I hate selfies. 

I want to punch girls who pout their lips and take narcissistic images of themselves. SERIOUSLY! I try to avoid these people.

 I remember that there was a time that I just couldn't stop myself. So, when my friend posted a selfie with a totally unrelated caption (some stupid quote), I couldn't stop myself and I made this comment...

"Love yourself much?"

Yes...I am that mean. That's why I'm changing.

So now, I have few friends. And these friends help me in my journey to be a better person. 

These are people who have accepted me in their homes, dined in mine and have met my parents. 

These are people who, I can run to when I'm sad. I go to them when I'm scared. With them, I can take off my shields and be weak. I know they won't judge.

Sadly, many of them are not in Manila. I'm thankful that the internet has made them accessible. 

So, how few exactly are my friends?

I think I only have around....5. Just 5. I have met many people but I realize only 5 can genuinely be there for me.

How about you? How many real friends do you have?

Here are some guide questions...

1. You are stranded along Edsa, who will you call?
2. You need to go to the obgyn, who will you ask to accompany you?
3. You have to go to the emergency room at 10 pm at night, who will go to you?
4. You are depressed at 2 AM, who will you send a message to?
5. You are out of the country and your parents encountered something bad, who will you ask to go there and check?

Lastly.... Who among your friends now, will you be there for all the 5 questions I asked. 





  1. hahah when i answered all your 5 questions the only 2 people who came to mind were Paul and my sister... aside from them I have my 2 high school best friends who knows everything about me and who are like family :) so not counting family.. i only have TWO real life friends. :)

    1. Two is a good number! I have friends for all 5 but they are scattered in different islands and continents.
      I think I was just doing "inventory" when I wrote this. Just to check if I have good stocks in the "friendship warehouse".
      I genuinely believe that friendships can be built and destroyed. So, we always have the option to increase our "inventory" but we also have to do our part.
      Friendship is an active investment.
      I invest and gamble too when it comes to finding new friends.
      But If not worth it, like that biatch above, then i dispose just like I would a stock with declining values.

    2. well said L! i used to be the kind who's so trusting and who can make friends easily. as in hindi lang tayo acquaintances or friends but BFF pa! I used to be able to openly share my life story with a lot of people but I've been hurt and burned so many times that I somehow became more cautious and less trusting. Like Robert de Niro sa Meet the Fockers, I have my circle of trust. It makes life simpler and less head and heartache. :) kaya siguro it was so easy for me to decide to move kasi less "strings attached" and i know that my best friends and family will always be there despite the distance.

    3. I made some of my closest friends while I was away from home! You'd be surprised Baka yung 3rd real friend mo, dyan mo ma me meet

    4. true!! actually when we moved dun ko talaga nakita who were the ones genuinely concerned and who really took the effort to stay connected with us. Madali lang kasi sabihin ang "i miss you!" pero normally empty words lang un. while some i'm surprised, i wasn't expecting them to keep in touch but they did and still do.