Grabe! Eto na ang hugot movie ng taon!! Wives, watch with your husbands! Hopefully after watching mag open up kayo ng feelings nyo sa isa't-isa. charot.
Relate ako sobra!!!
My husband doesn't share his stress and issues with me...willingly. Ofcourse, medyo heightened ang senses ko sa mga yan and I have a way of getting info through questions. Yan mga natutunan ko sa mga researcher friends ko sa industriya.
The way he sees it, he doesn't want me to worry. The way I see it, he just doesn't want to involve me because he doesn't value my opinions.
I told my mom about this and she told me that my dad never opened up to her that our business fell apart in 1982. He was very quiet at home. He never cried to my mom. He just prayed and quietly rebuilt his business. It was so bad that he wanted to close our store and just go to Taiwan and work in a factory. On her end, my mom never pestered him with questions. She paid for the household bills. She paid for her own prenatal check ups and even her own delivery. She bought my infant milk formula and everything I needed with her own salary from teaching. She never asked money from him. She knew something was wrong but she also didn't know enough to help.
I realize...perhaps...Silence is the best help we can give to our husbands.
The movie touches on this topic. Grabe and intense! If you are in a mature relationship, you will really understand and emphasize. If medyo nasa "pabebe" phase pa kayo, skip this movie.
Napaisip nga ako e.
How come even if I know for a fact that men have egos and it is my job to be a cheerleader, minsan I still criticize and correct? Matalino naman ako sa psychology and principles of behavioral economics. Still, there are days that I can't help but point out what went wrong, debrief my husband and brainstorm on the solution. As if task force meeting lang! Ofcourse there are times that he is not receptive. Dun, I will get frustrated and lose it. Lahat ng communication techniques ko natutunan sa Stephen Covey workshop, Baboosh.
My husband and I, we have a very open communication. Siguro magaling lang din ako mag facilitate (Oo ako na magaling! Haha).
He told me...
"When I do something wrong, I already know I am wrong. I already feel bad that I am wrong. You don't need to tell me that I am wrong. All I need you do to is tell me that everything will be okay
While I understand that, my training tells me, "Yes it is okay to be wrong but we have to process it so that it doesn't happen again."
Ah basta ang hirap! May times talaga that I hear myself talk like a project leader/coach/teacher and not a wife. Alam ko naman yan pero sometimes I can't help myself. Open naman ako. Sinabi ko naman yan sa nanay nya, sa nanay ko. Minsan kasi they wonder bakit bihira nalang ako sa office namin. I had to explain this dynamics.
I am very self aware na sa lagay na yan ha!
I make sure na my husband is ahead of me. I no longer have a senior job. Aware naman ako na if I continue with my career, medyo asshole din ako at mayabang. So I consciously took myself out of the game because I can't help but compete with my husband. Even in our business, I have to restrain myself and allow him to lead. In fairness,iba naman talaga kami ng skill set. That helps.
Unlike with my ex na same field kami. My ex once told me, "Nakaka-lalake ka talaga. You emasculate me". Syempre natuto na ang lola mo.
My husband is my "Second Chance" at love. Ay buti nalang at super upgrade to the max. Kaya I really try apply my learnings. Ah pero mahirap pa rin!
Minsan may nga couples dyan na di nag aaway. Hay sus. I'm sure hindi nag uusap mga yan. #bitter.
Minsan I attend weddings and I'm like... "Bwahahaha, kilig to det ka pa ngayon. Usap tayo after 5 years" #jaded
Oh sya! Go na! Watch na with your husbands! Tapus mag process kayo at mag open forum. Tapus mag reminisce kayo. Buy this book from www.milkandhoney.ph. Fill it up while having wine! Meron din ako. Ang ganda! Go buy na!
Sorry tagalog post. Effect ng Tagalog movie!