I love myself...

14 ...because I am fearfully and wonderfully made

Blessed,

L

MY FIRST EVER THANKSGIVING

It's almost 2 am and I still have a residual high from my first ever THANKSGIVING DINNER in our new home.

No, I didn't grow up in the States. I've just always been so fascinated with the concept of an American Thanksgiving that when I finally got an oven, I asked my brother Chef Louie to prepare a feast for me.

He certainly did!

Starting at 6 pm on a Wednesday he started BRINING the turkey and he made a raspberry compote. Kasi wala pong cranberries sa bukid namin. OS!

He arrived at around 2 pm THURSDAY ( technically yesterday na yun kasi it's 2 am now). 

He seasoned the turkey with herbs and spices then glazed it with honey and sugar. On top of that he coated it with....secret. He wanted it flavorful and malinamnam.

Lastly he stuffed it with lemons.

. 

Every 30 mins he would take the turkey out of the oven to baste it.

It took 4 hours or so for the 12lbs turkey to cook. My inlaws arrived 2 hrs before dinner time, so Louie panicked! You can't rush the turkey.  Then S arrived and he announced that he is hungry. In fact, he was so hungry that while the master was basting, he took spoonfuls of turkey fat and slurped it. Higupin ba naman ang taba. 

By 6:00 the turkey was almost ready...it was starting to look gorgeous

Hangtagal!!!! Hungry!!!

At exactly 7 pm,we were all so  gutom. We just had to eat na! 

But...when he put the turkey on the table, I was aghast! Oh no ano to? TURKEY binakol?! I thought it was overcooked and charred but surprisingly, the skin was flavorful, sweet and crispy. No burnt taste at all!  Apparently this was his plan all along. How dare I question the skills of the Master Baster.

We also had yams...which I just found out yesterday are just sweet potatoes. Ngek. Kamote lang pala.

For dessert, we had CLAFOUTIS. It's actually a french kind of fruit pie. Since the entire metro has no stock of confectionary sugar to dust the top of the pie, AS IN WALA, we had to make chantilly cream. 

Pretty naman di ba. Here's a beauty shot of my pie.

Because we were super hungry, we ate the turkey with RICE! Ofcourse rice + roasted poultry demanded a liter of cold COKE. And as if it wasn't filipinized enough, I ate with my hands...much to S' horror.

It was such a filling night! Filled with good food and good conversations with 2  good friends and my inlaws. When I saw the pictures, I am reminded that there's just so much to be thankful for.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

L

CHRISTMAS GIFTS SERIES: DWELLSTUDIO

DWELLSTUDIO is a New York based brand founded by Christiane Lemieux, a veteran in the world of fashion and home retail. 

Christiane studied art history and fashion design before setting her company.  She is a style icon in her native New York.

Judging from her IG, she seems to juggle work and motherhood quite well. Christiane claims that travel and family have become her main sources of inspiration.

F

The brand has a signature style. It is marked by it's distinct use of color incorporated into innovative and adventurous designs and it's commitment in ensuring the highest quality of construction and materials. The brand has a devoted following in the US and their mecca is the brand's flagship store in SOHO.

(Photo from Editoratlarge.com)

I got to visit the store a couple times and I fall inlove with the brand with each visit. The photo below was from my last trip to NYC.

Sorry, no cheapanga bedsheets in the store! The bedsheets are made from the finest mills of Portugal, Peru and India. Super Soft and Smooth. Kaloka! It's so hard to get out of bed!

The brand is available here in the Philippines, where is also has notable patrons.  In fact, it has  been featured in several of the country's top publications. 

If you want to spend more time cuddling with your husband, be cunning and get yourselves a DwellStudio Duvet Set. The sheets will pull him back to bed and stay with you. Hahaha.

I have one in red. (The painting is the work of my friend, Claribelle Floro)

My brother's girlfriend has a Tangerine Border sheets. Poor girl. She is starting to wake up really late daw.

DwellStudio also has a very distinct design for it's baby items. It's dainty and classy. It's not the typical cutesy patoosy style that is very usual with baby stuff.

The latest design is the "SAFARI". It's so fierce! Rawr!

(Photo from sohautestyle.com)

I also love the designs they have for baby girls, like this TREETOPS. The combination of Lime and Pink is just gorgeous.

And of course, I think it's not a secret that I love coral/peach.  This bamboo cotton blanket is really soft and light and yet it keeps babies warm.

ADORBS!!!!

I super love that when you see a DwellStudio item, the brand thumbprint is just so distinct. It's colorful yet not loud. It just looks very dainty, sweet and yet sophisticated. 

The brand is not cheapanga ha so don't be shocked when you see the price. Hahaha. Just give it to people you love. 

Next post will be about bags! I'm quite excited to put together a list of bags for my Christmas Gifts Series.

Ready for the Holidays,

L

Dwellstudio is available in Rustans, Mav Furrniture, Baby and Beyond, Babyland, Nurture Nook Cudlsy and for Cebuanos, check out Baobao Babies.

How to Stop A Fight Before it Starts

When we got inside the house, I couldn't find my keys. I thought I must have left them in Binondo.

My husband told me to check all my bags. Wala Talaga! Hay bakit ba ang burara ko.

Even if it got me worried, I told S to just get it the next day. But very typical of S, he wanted to fix the problem right away. 

Grumpily, he drove back to Binondo (from Makati).

When he got to Binondo, he checked the car, the office, the room...nothing. 

This time I looked for the keys in the living room (Makati) and found them tucked inside one of my vases. Ooopps. So he drove all the way there only to find out that the keys were just here the whole time. 

I knew that  he would be sighing a lot when he comes back. Experience taught me that he would launch into another series of sermons. 

I stopped talking to Ria and Maribel. I called Mcdo and placed an order. I got his favorites: CHEESEBURGER, TWISTER FRIES, SPAGHETTI AND SPRITE.

When he got home, the delivery arrived just in time. He wasn't ecstatic but seeing the MCDO paper bag certaintly pacified him. 

By time he was done eating his cheese burger and twister fries, he was smiling again.

Wives, if you eff up....call MCDO.

Hotline Number 8-6236

Relieved,

L

Awake

I was so tired so I slept.

I slept for months. It was as if my mind naturally fell into a state of coma. Apart from the occasional bursts of inspiration and panic attacks, it was a fairly sound sleep.

For the first time in a long time, I was able to enjoy "Shavasana". My mind was empty. I was really at peace. My eyes, my heart ...they learned to smiled.

Then just like that I woke up. After 9 months, I woke up.

Sad

I'm sad today...

Paano Magmukhang Mayaman

Yesterday, I attended a LUNCH-TIME party at the Manila Polo Club.  The only time I managed to set foot on this exclusive club was when I went there for a sales call.  So, I was quite happy to be a guest this time around.

While S was mingling, I started observing people. I was on a very unfamiliar and potentially threatening territory.

A 20-something girl approached and made chikka with the host. She has a light brown hair with soft curls. It goes without saying that her hair is a product of expensive salon treatments. She was wearing a knee length lemon colored dress and stilettos. She had a Mahalia Fuentes bag,  a beige quilted leather Chanel. The girl is pretty ha! But her aura was screaming "Trying Hard".

Then, I noticed another girl.  This particular girl got me very curious. Based on her features, she is not pretty at all. She was not wearing anything flashy. She had no make up on. She only had one accessory, a long necklace with one pendant. And yet, she looked very rich, refined and dainty. 

Have you ever noticed that there are some girls who are really fair and pretty and yet they don't have class or they don't have that "high-society" aura?  Or have you ever seen ladies who carry branded bags and yet the bags look fake on them?

I couldn't really understand the appeal of this girl. Since S was nowhere to be found,  I took my  question to Facebook...

"How to look and act mayaman?" (also sossy, high societ, alta)

I'm going to share with you the answers of my friends.  Compilation lang. Tamad e.

Jen:

"Maayos ang fez. Maayos ang kilay, konting blush, light lipstick. Natural lang"
"May air of confidence"
"Tapos, ang ayos ng hair...naka blow dry"
"Naka White Polo and jeans lang"


Chef Janice:
"White shirt lng dapat at lipstick and kilay lng ang ganap"
"Natural glow, no makeup makeup look"
"Simple lng din ung hair, either nakaponytail lang or bagsak lng... sosyal pag may natural curls... basta hindi dry ang hair and walang split ends..."
"Ang r dapat pag binigkas, nakaroll ang tongue"


Nina:
"Naka Perlas"


Richmond:
"Agree ako sa white shirt, pero stand out ang jewelries at bagelya! pagpasok ang bag ang nauuna at nakataas"
"Ang s kasunod lagi ang h. general rule like masarap to masharep, or masakit to mashekit"
"Dapat wag lang maitim ang siko at tuhod"


Chris Ever:

"Sideways umupo"
"Pag nag blink, dapat twice"


From my former boss:
Explosive ang pag pronounce ng letter T if the word starts with it.

Cris Canaria

"It all boils down to attitude. What you think, you become. So think ALTA thoughts. #napakainnabamgakabayo"

Pat Mallari

Simpleng sagot: etiquette, poise.

Putting all their visual descriptions into one board,  this  (apparently) is the Mayaman Look... (Click link)

COFFEE AND CAMERAS

Twitter is my least favorite social media platform. It's just so hard to keep up with all the feeds. But, I'm there because it's the quickest way to get the news (RAPPLER, CNN) and  design inspirations (Design-Milk). 

Now now...I don't really follow celebs or socialites. I don't really care about what they're up to.  And medyo KSP and haller sila minsan. 

However, I do follow several "regular" people in Twitter, like @mdjsuperstar and @juanxi. Sobrang benta ang sense of humor nila sakin.

A Eulogy

Michael Belonio announced in Facebook that he is celebrating his 10th year in the world of a accounting. I shared with him the comment my boss made when I celebrated my 6th year anniversary with Unilever. He said, " Congratulations on your longest relationship"

This made me remember my late boss, Tony.  I wish to share the my eulogy, which I wrote and delivered 4 years ago.

WARNING: this is quite sad...

------------------------------ (click the link to read more)

Good Evening.

I am L and I am Tony’s Martha.

For those of you from Tony’s church...I’m sure you know why.

I worry a lot and Tony always told me not to worry because God loves me and God will make things better. And when he said this, I felt safer. 

I worked with Tony for 4 years. It was like going University but only having 2 classmates. It’s amazing how Mico, Tony and I managed to form a family during that span of time. We didn't  even realize it.

I saw Tony everyday. He sat across me and only a translucent glass separated us. I covered it so that I won’t get to see his face for 10 hrs a day/ 5 days a week.

What I would give now to see it again...

For those of you who got to work with us...you know what a close and odd tandem we were. We were the exact opposite of each other.

He was fat and tall. I’m thin and small.
He was a gentleman and I am a palengkera.He shopped for branded stuff. I love ukay-ukay and  I made habit of bragging about my finds. 

One day, I came to work wearing a spanking new dress from Bangkok. Tony said… “ I like your dress. Is that from Ukay-ukay?” I gave him a really cold stare

Tony and I also lived in the same building. I am on the 12^th floor and he was on the 37^th. As if It wasn’t enough that we see each other at work di ba? We had to live in the same building pa

One time... he wanted to eat Paksiw na isda but he didn’t have pots and pans . I told him, he can cook in my house. He was so excited. He came with Fish, Gulay and he cooked. We didn't go to work that day. It was okay... he was my boss. How often can one say, "I slacked off with my boss"?

He seemed to really like his Paksiw na Isda so I pretended to really like it as well. I’m from Iloilo and we call that Pinamalhan. We only cook this dish if the fish is not fresh. It’s a sad ulam for me. But he enjoyed it... so we ate while watching a Jon Lloyd and Sara G movie. 

Yes, I made Tony watched jeje movies. I'm jeje.  In fair, He laughed so hard at the cheesy lines. I wondered if he used some on Cathy.

You know…I believed everything Tony said. When he said that he used to be ill and  that God healed him, I believed him. When he shared the symptoms but told me that "All those are now gone"...I believed him.

And I didn’t worry. Afterall, everything was always in past tense.

Perhaps I should have worried more, Perhaps I should have not believed him...

....In the same respect that I shouldn’t have believed him when he said that food cooked in a microwave would glow in the dark.

Once, we had lunch and he said he doesn’t want to heat his food in our office microwave because of the radiation. To prove his point, he explained the effect of radiation on molecules. If the radiation is strong DAW it would make molecules move so fast to the point that they would create heat and make the food glow.

So I heated my food, covered it with my hands and I said, "Tony wala naman e!" He said, "Maliwanag  pa kasi." So I went home by 6 pm but the in Singapore, the sun sets around 7:30 pm. I put my food in the microwave again, heated it and went inside my dark storage room and waited for the food to glow. It didn’t so I called him.

He said, "Hoy, Stop playing with your food!" Then he called Hedda and they laughed about it. MEAN!

The next day I glared at him.

4 years is a long time. You get to know someone really well.

Tony always made a good impression. He was handsome, eloquent.

Gosh, my ilonggo friends all said,"Bawww ka gwapo guid. Daw artista." And my mom even told him with her trademark ilonggo accent, "Ang gwapo mo, bakit di ka nalang mag artista."

But for me and Mico, we were stuck with him even during his bad days. But we found ourselves still loving him nevertheless. That’s when we realized that ARE more than workmates. We are friends. 

But you should have seen me and Tony fight. Our fights were as highschool as it could get. I’d ignore him for days . He’d be super taray. There were a lot of "Let me finish!" during discussions But we would just naturally patch things up. ALWAYS.

Tony is probably the only guy who put up with my "Afternoon Tea- Lets's-Pretend-To Be-Royalty" fascination.

When we were in Capetown, he tried bribing the concierge of Mt. Nelson to get us seats. We didn’t get it but I saw how much he tried. Then, he got me my first Wedgwood teaset which made my then- boyfriend's gift looked pitiful compared to his.

 Tony also made it his mission to correct my pronunciation of the explosive T. So I always made an effort to do that when I was with him. Note that it was an effort for me. But for Tony it sounded effortless and crisp. We would hear him answer the phone with a “Hello This is Tony How can I help you?" 

Mico and I decided to call him Tony the Tiger behind his back. Bad!

The Bembol and Bimbol Roco was also a long debate. I won’t get into that.

You have no idea how much I miss Tony now. I do not know go back to work, knowing I’d never see him again.

Tony also ways pushed me to be the best. Sometimes in the process, he made me cry.

One time he asked me to put the packaging pictures side by side for Carl. I did exactly that and he said, "This is not the work of a manager. This is something a brand assistant would produce." I got really mad and cried.

 Now I know why he did that. He was preparing me. When he was in the hospital, we had to do a presentation for a WL6 and we did a great job.

Even during the last moments of his life, when he was in the hospital. He thought of me and mico. Finding us new teams, perhaps worrying what would happen to us when he’s gone.

I’m happy to hear from Cathy and Pastor Joseph that Tony was proud of me. This means the world to me.

I did a video montage for him, which I will share with you.

I hope this presentation is much better compared to that packaging presentation I did and I hope I continue to make him proud.

Tony, I still can not believe all the things that are happening now.

I miss you terribly.

No goodbyes.

L

--------------------------------------------

PS.

Reading this is still overwhelming. I can't believe it has been gone for 4 years now.

Tony passed away in his 30s... 

I can't believe I'm in my 30s too...

My Husband Needs Respect

I know of a lady, who implicitly told people that her husband is weak. She shared that she wanted to move out of her inlaw's house but her husband could not tell his parents. He also couldn't afford to buy a house on his own. She also told her friends that the allowance she was getting was not enough. Thankfully, she was receiving assistance from her dad. Candidly, she shared a story about that time when her father-in-law told a joke which she found offensive. She added that her husband didn't say anything to redeem her.

Her words portrayed him as a man who had no voice in his parent's house. And she shared her frustrations with anyone who wanted to listen...

I've only had coffee/drinks with her 3x in my life but somehow that was enough for me to have an impression that her husband doesn't seem to have balls. And I don't even know the guy! But in the same respect that we have opinions when we read a novel, the same is true when we listen to other people's story.

I learned the hard way that disrespect can emasculate a man. A man who has been emasculated is no longer capable to love.

Allow me to share a mistake I made with my ex.  My ex was relocated to another country, where he was leading a team for the first time in his career. He didn't have time to talk to me and I felt unloved. Instead of showing my real feelings, I responded in anger. I remembered saying this...

Click below to continue

The Games We Used to Play: DISCOVERY DEPOT

Do you remember the games and the toys you used to play with as a child?

I loved playing INs or "patintero" in tagalog.

I also remember that I loved playing "balay-balay" with my 2 playmates, Cookie and Jammie.

For some weird reason, part of this make-believe play was speaking in Tagalog and calling myself, "Sunshine."   I'm Ilongga. My  real name starts with the letter, L. And, I don't have a sunny personality.

We used bedsheets as the roof our make-shift house. We had real clay pots where we cooked our "laswa". I  had a wooden ironing board and a small plastic basin where we washed handkerchiefs.  I even had a "humba-humba" or rocking chair for Cookie, who always played the "Lola".

Because I loved playing "balay-balay" or house, I  grew up very domesticated. I can cook, wash and iron clothes, sweep and mop the floor. YOU NAME IT!

Could this be the effect of playing house ?

Nowadays toddlers (even those as young as 1 year old)  have access to Ipads.  When they cry, the easiest way to shut them up is to let them watch Peppa Pig.  I'm curious to find out the effect of this.

Admittedly, I am also starting to get addicted to my Ipad. I've only had it for 3 years!

S took me to Mommy Mundo this afternoon. I saw the booth of Wonder Depot and this toy caught my attention.

This is a real tool. Kids can actually use this to build something! This toy encourages dads to spend time with their sons while learning a new skill.

I know I seem to fuel gender stereotypes but truth be told, I love a guy who can do some carpentry or who can do electrical stuff. POGI POINTS talaga!!! Alam mo, when S fixes the electric fan ay sus kilig na kilig ako. Charot.

The booth is small so I quickly noticed the kitchen set and other kitchen stuff from Wonder World.

LOVEEEE!!!! I wish I had this when I was young.

Hay, maybe I'm old fashioned lang but I really believe these are the toys that kids should play with.  They shouldn't be spending their time with Ipads and TVs.

And you know what, if you can teach them to enjoy chores...ay pwede ng walang maid. Di ba! Heheheh. Swerte ni S, nag "balay-balay" ako, so wala kaming yayabelles sa house. 


If you happen to find yourself in Makati tomorrow, swing by the MOMMYMUNDO BAZAAR and look for the DISCOVERY DEPOT booth. They're on sale.




Nostalgic,

L

Submissiveness

When you hear the word "submissive", what comes to mind?

A martyr? 
A loser?
An abusive relationship?
50 shades of Grey?

In BDSM (Bondage & Discipline, Sadomasochism & Masochism),  the submissive takes the passive receiving role. The submissive obeys the dominant. 

I won't talk about BDSM because I do not practice this erotica. I do not wish to judge people who are into these erotic practices. Personally, I do not like giving or inflicting pain. The very thought of it horrifies me, which is why I never finished the book. QUE HORROR!

Now, I'm pretty sure that a number of you have read "50 Shades of Grey." I won't ask if you enjoyed this porno version of Twilight.  I promise not to judge you by your literary choices. You are my friend.

Let's face it. Who doesn't want a RICH, MYSTERIOUS Guy, who is always IN-CONTROL?  I just don't want him to spank me because if he does, I swear, I will show him some serious Muay Thai moves.

Come to think of it, I have never been attracted to weak guys. But I have dated nice (meek, weak, passive) guys. Needless to say, those relationships never lasted. I ended up castrating nearly all of them, figuratively ofcourse.

With utmost honest,  I can admit to you that I was wrong. 

Then I met S, the eldest and the only boy in a pure Fil-Chi family. His ego is bigger than Kim Kardashian's ass. 

Prior to marriage, I found this ego quite attractive. Infact, I found it sexy when it was expressed in business and stocks. But after marriage, it became quite frustrating.

It is a good thing that I am currently reading this book "Love and Respect" by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs.

This was given to me by one of my bridesmaid, Josette. Perhaps, she knew that our egos would clash  the moment our honeymoon period ended.

Submission, in the context of this book, is respecting my husband. We are talking about UNCONDITIONAL RESPECT here. 

Husbands, or men in general, need to be respected. The problem is, nowadays women have achieved so much (if not more) in life. It is very hard to give unconditional respect when you feel that you have equal capabilities and equal voice. 

As woman, I believe that if I'm on the right in an argument, I will fight for it. If I see a flaw or an opportunity for my husband to improve, I feel it is my duty to correct him. And  if I feel he has a big adversary, I feel it's my mission to fight the battle in his behalf. I want to be a partner, a mentor and mother in one. I mean well.

I'm a sucker for efficiency. I want to correct now so that we can be effective now. I want to discuss now so that we can agree now. Patience is not my virtue.

Patience is a mandatory virtue for all wives.

It may take a while for my husband to come to the same conclusions as me. It may take a while for him to share my sentiments. But I have to respect his process. I have to be patient even if I am itching to resolve everything in 1 hour.

Example:

I raise a concern about his annual business targets. I ideally want him to respond with a plan during that very meeting. The moment I do not see the same level of PASSION and ENTHUSIASM, I feel agitated. I feel that he is not interested. That or he doesn't have a clue. And my instincts tell me to take over the meeting and answer my own questions.

This is wrong. I stop myself.

I must be patient. And respect his silence. I have to listen and respect his answers, however "eeerr" they may seem to be. 

Hard no?

Why wait for him to come up with the right plan, if I already have one.

WRONG!

Respect.

It is hard.

My intentions are good. Unfortunately,  if I am impatient and step into his role, my husband will feel that such actions undermine his capabilities. 

And so I stop myself. And yet, my eyeballs have lives of their own. This too is a sign of disrespect.

When a wife, disrespects her husband, he becomes unloving towards her. Thus begins the "Crazy Cycle", which I will talk about next time.

For now, I am trying to be submissive by respecting my husband. It is very hard. I think and act very fast, almost impulsively.  S is more calculating and discerning. I need to adjust. 

If you happen to find a pill for patience, please mail them to me. I need patience to be submissive so that I can effectively respect my husband.

Submissive in Progress,

L