Day 77: My Dad is Yoda

Let me tell you about my dad.

He is a man way ahead of his time. His thoughts are so rich and his mind moves faster than his lips. So, he communicates in a very different style.

Most often than not, people don't understand him. My mom, until now, doesn't really understand how his mind works.

My dad always has a grand plan and in his head, everything is laid out. He is not a very effective communicator so he just skips the explanation. He speaks in parables and sayings. He is as weird as Yoda. He is starting to look like Yoda too.

When my brother was 11 years old,  he sent him to boarding school...IN ANOTHER ISLAND. My mom cried. My brother cried. They both didn't understand why my fat brother was being punished.  My dad believed that if my brother grew up with my mom, she would pamper and feed him until he becomes an obese momma's boy. It was necessary for LV to be sent way so that he'd learn to be a man.
But for most people, this was so cruel.

When I graduated from university, he got my credit card and he told me that I don't have a place in the family business. Oh My God! I panicked! I didn't plan at all. I thought, I'd be working in our small store and eventually, I'd be married to some guy who has a small store as well.

I immediately applied to law school but backed out when it dawned on me that I'd be dependent on my parents for 4-5 more years.  Thankfully, a big FMCG company offered me a job. When I got a job, he returned my credit card.

???

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In the past, I swear to God I didn't understand his "sermons". Don't get me wrong, he never nags. He just made really strange suggestions. I refused to heed his words because I wasn't as enlightened as him then. (Naks, as if enlightened na ako ngayon. Hahah)

There was a time, when he told me to quit my job and go to China. That was a weird and untimely suggestion because I was 23 and I just got promoted to assistant manager.  He told me that I was in the process of falling into a comfort zone. He said I must go to China without any job prospects. He strongly believed hunger and desperation would lead to brilliant ideas and would open new opportunities for me.

Ofcourse, I didn't go! His idea sounded absurd!

Eventually, I did move to a foreign country when I was 26. I felt so alive. I understood what he meant. I learned to make friends because I had none. I explored new places because I was bored. The new country gave me exciting opportunities.

There is usually a 1-3 year gap from his sharing to my understanding. I suppose it's okay given that my father is 32 years older than me.

My dad self-actualized when he was in his late 40s. He gave away his expensive watches because he said, he would no longer be governed by time. Unfortunately, he was the only one in the house to achieve self actualization so my mom freaked out when he gave his Tag Heuer to his driver.

My dad continued to achieve enlightenment. Without studying buddhism, he instinctively knew that detachment to material things can lead to healing. He de-cluttered his life by giving away old things, including stuff that belonged to my mom! This caused him so much trouble! My mom is lightyears away from enlightenment.  She is a pragmatist.

Since, I have lived away from home for more than 10 years, my dad communicates his "enlightenment" and "sermons" through books and letters. This is actually better than us talking face to face because I can process his messages at my own pace and at my own time.

His message during the last 4 years is  all about building a family and giving up my corporate life in exchange for a simpler one. It was really hard to process until I turned 30.  It was only when I turned 30 that felt I needed to find my greater purpose.

Oh it was hard to quit, I tell you. I loved my boss, my job, my team and my salary! However, I knew my life will change the moment I become a wife. I needed to explore, be stupid, be crazy before I walk down that aisle.

I was really decided to quit my job and do the whole "Eat, Pray, Love" thing. In fact, I had a good start. I went to Spain and did a whole lot of EATING (and drinking).

However, after 75 days, I got tempted to work again. The glamour and power are just so tempting. Pride is my greatest nemesis.

When I came home from my interview, I was willing to put my plans on hold again. I wanted to work! I started fantasizing about the new job. S felt very sad.

Then... my brother arrived and gave me a parcel. It was from my dad and he sent me a letter and a book. How strange and timely!

I decided to read the book over cupcakes and coffee. (I just had to post a picture because the cupcakes look so pretty)

Anyway, as I read the book,  I realized why I retired to begin with. I wanted to have time to do the things I have always wanted to do. I wanted to have time to read. I wanted to have time to prepare healthy food. I wanted to spend time with friends and family.

I don't know how my dad figured out that I am getting restless again. Maybe his enlightenment radar has been amplified and he can now do mental telepathy. I honestly don't know but I'm really thankful to have a wise father.

He is so down to earth and generous.  He only asked me to a good wife to my husband and a good mother to my future children. He wants us to have a simple wedding because he believes marriage is not dependent on the grandness of the reception.  He never told S to be successful or provide for things I have been accustomed to. He just said...LIVE A SIMPLE LIFE.

I am so blessed to have him as my father.  He is so wise and I am so lucky to have him as my teacher. He is my YODA and I'm his Luke Skywalker.


Still on Pause,

L