To celebrate my baby's 100th day, I just made a simple dinner for me, my husband and the yaya.
It was so simple...I didn't even buy a cake. Instead, I just stacked leftover cupcakes and stuck a lollipop on top. Clever di ba!
I prepared 2 red eggs as it is customary. Red eggs are for good luck and for new beginnings.
Then, I offered a prayer of thanks for the 100 days filled with happiness, love, tears, fears. You name it, I felt it.
As I was thanking God, my baby decided to poop. I was holding her and I felt her poop come out. She pooped so much, some of it spilled on my hands.
You know, I learned that I should celebrate her every chance I get.
I usually worry about the future so much and with motherhood, this mindset got even worse. But my baby encourages me to take a chill pill and just enjoy the present. When I worry, she smiles or do crazy stuff like crapping on my hands.
I am unprepared for the emotions and the challenges that came with it.
Currently, I have bouts of post partum depression, which is either caused or compounded by OCD. I won't get into that.
I worry about my baby endlessly but when she smiles...I forget my worries.
My husband also told me that some of his family read my blog and got hurt. Truth be told, I don't know why they would read it when told me not to google stuff and worry myself silly.
So, I decided to stop writing for a while just to avoid trouble.
If you miss me, you can always message me and I will try my best to reply.
For now, I realize that the future is so uncertain and I really have to enjoy each day with my baby. The greatest lesson, motherhood has taught me is to just be thankful for each day that my child is healthy and happy. I should stop worrying about things. So for now, avoid the news and avoid anything that will cause paranoia.