When I started this blog, I just wanted a space to document the days of my sabbatical. Imagine how happy I am that his blog allowed me to meet friends and reach out to many people, who I would have never met had I not started writing.
The biggest blessing is the feeling that I am not alone. It's a comforting thought!
Thank you to all those who wrote me. I'm sending one reader, a gift and a card :) I'm thoughtful that way. Hahah
Around the 24th week of my pregnancy, my stomach just grew big over night! It was as if I slept and someone decided to put stones inside my belly and I woke up with my stomach twice as large as it was the night before.
Okay, so maybe I'm exaggerating but I experienced a sudden growth spurt around the 24th-26th week of pregnancy.
I could no longer wear my ordinary jeans, shorts and even pajamas. I slept wearing only a top. For a while there, I looked like Winnie the Pooh.
Maybe he hated the way I look, so on my 20th week, my husband took me to Mamaway in Shangrila Mall. He demanded that we need to buy new maternity pants and that I should start wearing pants again!
He also bought some maternity jeans and slacks from Zalora to make that I have no excuse in looking like a sexually-ambiguous bear.
The ones from Zalora were significantly cheaper but they proved to be useless because the bands covering my belly are not that wide. When I climb up the stairs or when I sit down, my butt crack shows!!! I still wear them occasionally.
The pants from Mamaway are the best! The bands are wide and they cling to my belly. I can move around without them slipping down. They are stretchable so I can wear them until I give birth.
They are made with 97% cotton and 3% spandex. The pants are so soft and comfortable. It's perfect for Philippine weather!
I didn't buy a lot. I only got 2 pairs because I don't want to get use to this level of comfort. I plan to lose the weight and wear my old jeans as soon as possible. In fact, I only bought 3 maternity dresses.
Next week, I really need to get new bras. My breasts also had a growth sprout of their own. I swear, my areola even grew wider diameter! Mama told me that this is my body changing in preparation for breastfeeding.
If I exercise, I'm sure my flat tummy will return. But there are no crunches for breasts! So I also don't know how to reduce my cup size after giving birth...
Anyway! If you want to buy my comfortable maternity pants or buy maternity/nursing bras, you can find Mamaway Products in:
What a beautiful ad released by the brilliant marketing and advertising team of Jollibee!
While watching this ad, i think about our breakfast drive-throughs in Jollibee, along Osmeña Road. I always order the same thing too. I order the Longanisa meal and my husband orders Burger Steak. The big difference between us and the old couple in the commercial is we don't have a scenic route to "Jollibee". Our view is the legendary traffic of Metro Manila.
I cried at the ending! It really struck a cord! What a beautiful and moving TV commercial!
This ad is clearly a market development campaign designed to increase frequency of consumption. I know it sounds so heartless! But this objective backed with solid market info and consumer insight created a masterpiece!
Now, this is why you pay an advertising agency good money! Base on your business need, the creative team will weave a story that will subliminally convey your objective to your target market.
After watching the commercial, I want to build a habit of having a "meaningful" Jollibee breakfast with husband. I should also try to shut up and save all my business for the office. Any stressful business topic ruins the mood.
Since yesterday, my husband has been in a terribly bad mood. There's so much to do and so many things to fix.
There are no words spoken but I feel the tension and it's getting to me.
Now, I understand that my job is to be my husband's cheerleader. But, I tell you, it's really hard to give him love when all I want to do is smack him.
Of course I don't that!
Last night, I asked him..." Is there anything I can do to cheer you up?" Without look away from his computer screen, he answered, "I'm okay." I mumbled some snarky remarks as I went inside our room. Thankfully, he didn't hear anything.
It's so hard to be the bearer of joy when I'm feeling bad vibes. That's why my top priority in life is to keep my mental sanity and my happiness. If I am not thinking and feeling right, I really have nothing to give.
The reality is, you can't count on anyone to make you happy. If you do, you will just end up frustrated. Happiness is within your own control.
That being said, I can't expect my husband to snap out of his stress parade before I can start feeling good again. That's something I need to do on my own.
Today marks my second year of starting this journal. The day coincides with my 2nd year of sabbatical.
Many things happened in the span of two years. I retired. I got married. I travelled. I adjusted to married life. I studied Spanish! I did a lot of yoga. I helped out in our business. I struggled to conceive. I conceived. And...I shared my journey with all of you.
I wonder if it was very short-sighted to name my journal, ME ON PAUSE. Clearly, life is now moving very fast. I wonder if it's still appropriate
You see, I started writing to document my days of doing nothing after nearly 11 years of doing everything. Hence the title, ME ON PAUSE.
FYI, I did intend to make it read like menopause because "menopause" is also a transitional phase.
I'm writing this entry while you are out jogging. I will sneakily post this on your blog.
While I was alone at home this evening, I decided to watch our baby's 4D ultrasound video on the tv. I know I've seen it countless of times on my phone since we got it but it's different seeing it on the big screen. You have got to Chromecast it one of these days.
I'm amazed at what we created. And I found myself getting teary-eyed. Seeing it yawn, wiggle and play with its toes was sheer joy.
I wish to say thank you. Thank you for loving me unconditionally. Thank you for choosing me to take on this journey with you. I know it wasn't easy. The first few months were filled with doubt and fears. A lot of sleepless nights praying for God's will. But here we are. Just a few months shy of seeing our bundle of joy for the first time.
During our quiet nights in bed together, we've shared about our excitements and fears of becoming parents; the thrill of seeing and holding our baby for the first time, and worry of the time when it grows up and decides to go out till the wee hours of the morning with its friends. I guess that's what it means to be parents.
A song comes to mind, one that I've heard of a few years back but only now do the lyrics make sense.
If I could, I'd protect you From the sadness in your eyes Give you courage in a world of compromise Yes, I would
If I could, I would teach you All the things I've never learned And I'd help you cross the bridges that I've burned Yes, I would
If I could, I would try to shield Your innocence from time But a part of life I gave you isn't mine I've watched you grow, so I could let you go
If I could, I would help you Make it through the hungry years But I know that I can never cry your tears But I would, if I could
If I live in a time and place where you don't want to be You don't have to walk along this road with me My yesterday won't have to be your way
If I knew, I would try to change The world I brought to you to And there isn't very much that I, I could do But I would, if I could
Oh baby, mummy wants to protect you And help my baby through the hungry years It's part of
And if you ever, ever need Sad shoulder to cry on I'm just someone to talk to I'll be there, I'll be there
I didn't change your world But I would, if I could
Oh darling, I love you baby
You know, my greatest fear is to not be able to be there for you and our child. I worry that I won't be able to protect both of you from the world. I worry that I am may not be providing enough or do what is right and expected of as the head of the family. All these fears have been magnified 100 times now that we will be parents.
But with all these fears, I take comfort in the fact that I have God beside me. I know He will not let me down. And of course, I know that I have you beside me; to pick me up when I falter, and to help me teach our child to be the best that it can be. I know that we will give it the greatest love that the world has known.
Our little family is growing. Soon, there will be three of us. And I can't wait t have both of you around my arms.
This Valentine's Day, I have no flowers (maybe...), no card, no gift. What I have are these words that I have written here for the world to see.
Thank you for giving me your heart and soul. I am forever grateful.
Ever since I saw the face and the movements of the little human growing inside me, I have fallen deeply and madly in love with this beautiful soul.
I watch the video over and over again, and as I watch my child yawn, smile and move...I feel so much love and worry.
I worry if I will be able to give my child a good life. The world is changing so fast. Information is changing society and her values. Life is no longer as simple as it used to be. People nowadays see so much so they have more wants. Technology has made people impatient for results, for feedback and for attention...
I will be raising a "Millenial". I hope I am equipped to be a good parent.
I feel so much love because this creature was sleeping peacefully in the stars and I pulled it down to earth to be with us. I feel responsible to make this star's trip worth it.
As I write this, my child moves around my tummy. I can already imagine what it's doing. It's probably sucking its toes again.
I'm filled with so much love...
I know I had doubts about being a mother but after I've seen my child move, smile and sleep so peacefully in my womb...I feel so blessed with this experience to create life.
I'm sorry for the senti post today. I just feel so much...
P.S.> I will use "IT" until I know the gender. English doesn't seem to have a gender neutral pronoun.
A man who goes home to a happy home is a man ready to face the world.
There is truth to the saying, "HAPPY WIFE, HAPPY LIFE"... especially if that wife is me.
I have a very infectious energy. If I am happy, the entire house or office is happy. I am the type who will organize parties, initiate activities, fuel conversations and anything related to skillful hosting
However, if I am sad...all the curtains are closed and the house is dark. I lose my appetite and no appetite means no cooking. I don't talk. I don't have energy to meet people. The best part is, I bring everyone with me down. I am just a bundle of gloom.
When I am sad, my husband is the one most affected. He feeds on my joy and happiness just like a leech feeds on blood.